Back-to-school season always brings a mix of excitement and nerves. But when you’re parenting a neurodivergent child, those first weeks may look very different than you imagined – and that’s okay.
What I Expected
As a kid, I loved the first day of school – picking out a brand-new outfit, reuniting with friends, and nervously settling into new routines.
I pictured my daughter’s school days the same way: fresh clothes, after-school snacks, a little relaxation, and then homework.
What It Really Looks Like
Reality? Not even close.
We’re in a season where only certain clothes feel right. The same shorts and tops, rotated in a few colors, are all she’ll wear. Shoes? Same deal – worn-in and comfortable, not shiny or new.
After school, she’s exhausted but wired – bouncing between projects, melting down when things don’t work, and resisting homework at every turn.
It’s not the picture-perfect routine I once imagined, but it’s ours.
Letting Go of the Little Things
Over the years, I’ve learned to let go of what doesn’t matter.
- Hair a mess? If she feels confident, that’s enough.
- Same outfit every day? At least it’s clean.
- Worn-in shoes? If she puts them on without a fight, I’ll take it.
We still snap first-day photos, but she’s in her favorite summer outfit while I’m sweaty from working so hard just to get us out the door on time.
And you know what? That’s real life.
Partnering with Teachers
One of the biggest shifts for me has been learning to partner closely with teachers.
I start each school year by sharing a bit about her background and making sure they know they can reach out for anything – big or small.
If there’s a medication change, stress at home, or mood shift, I try to keep her teacher in the loop. Likewise, I want teachers to feel comfortable sharing what they notice at school.
Two weeks into this year, I’ve already emailed, met her teacher, and volunteered in class. The office staff and principal know me from previous years – not because I’m “that mom,” but because I’m present and connected.
It’s not what I pictured, but it helps both of us feel grounded.
The Information Overload
Here’s where I struggle: how much information is too much?
I read about ADHD, dyslexia, and neurodivergence constantly. Some resources encourage me; others make me spiral.
For example:
- My daughter is social and has friends, but I’ve read that kids with ADHD sometimes struggle socially later. Do I prepare for that – or just enjoy the friendships she has now?
- She loves school and shines in creativity, but I’ve read dyslexia stories where kids grow to hate school. Do I warn her – or keep celebrating her wins?
Sometimes, the sheer amount of information makes me hypervigilant, scanning every school interaction for signs of trouble that may never come.
Finding Balance as a Parent
What I’ve learned is this: peace comes from celebrating small victories, keeping communication open, and remembering no two neurodivergent kids are the same.
Parenting a child with ADHD, dyslexia, or other learning differences doesn’t come with a rulebook. Some days feel heavy. Some are joyful. Most are both.
Through it all, I remind myself:
My daughter is strong, creative, and capable. She may not follow the path I once envisioned, but she’s paving her own – and I get to walk beside her.
A Helpful Resource for Parents of Neurodivergent Kids
One resource that’s encouraged me is Impact Parents. Their free podcasts offer practical, realistic tools for parents of ADHD and neurodivergent kids.
(This is an affiliate link. I may earn a small commission if you decide to make a purchase, at no extra cost to you.)
Let’s Talk
If you’re navigating back-to-school with a neurodivergent child, how do you balance learning from resources without feeling overwhelmed?
Do you prepare for challenges in advance or take things one day at a time?
Share your experience in the comments. I’d love to hear what works for your family.
Honest stories. Real parenting moments. Zero perfection.
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